Anti-Porn Meme I Just Can't Stand




I saw something on Facebook today. A meme depicting two women in front of art canvases. One woman was dressed "sexy" and taking a selfie, while the other woman was dressed in a t shirt and pants with a beautifully painted canvas. One woman had hundreds of likes, while the seemingly talented artist had little likes.


At first, I was drawn into the meme because I thought to myself, well, that is quite interesting. Maybe that is true. And then I started realizing what the meme was saying was nothing I actually agreed with.


You see, it almost insults me, okay, it does insult me, in a good way because it inspired me to write here about this topic. Below the meme i noticed hash tags from a group of anti-porn activists. I think of myself as a feminist who believes that every woman has the right to expressing themselves in whatever way they please, unless it is causing violence to another (non-consensual of course), but apparently this meme and activist group was saying that if you dress a certain way and take selfies, you are automatically feeding into porn culture.... and well, porn culture, is wrong.


So, now I am becoming aware that according to these activists, not only is it not okay to partake in porn, to watch it, but it is also not okay to flaunt ones sexuality because it is automatically labeled as porn.


It purposely seeks to trigger the insecurities of women, or the women who hold a belief that because they are not partaking in an expression of sexuality or the "in" styles, that they are being left out by society and ultimately by the validation of society as a worthy citizen. Which I do not believe to be true. What could easily transform this into a positive meme, would be if the two women even though dressed how they please and creating art how they also please, could both stand confident in who they are without the validation of anyone, or any "like". But, I see it's point too. Seek validation beyond the likes. Yes, but it still bothers me that they decided to publicly shame women who want to express themselves in a more sexual way. After all, we are all sexual creatures.


Thus, I feel as if this meme is actually seeking to pit women against each other based on this fictitious belief of beauty standards and self worth. It is actually achieving a reaction I am sure is quite opposite of the point it is supposedly trying to attain from viewers.


For me, a woman who enjoys expressing through various mediums including modeling and fashion. I found this meme to be very insulting just because I am very aware of how it feels to not have my words read or praised, but to have my photos "liked" hundreds of more times. It really has to be one of the most enlightening experiences of being a woman active on social media these days, just because we are seeing a spike in people who are able to express easier than ever.


For so long, the medium of modeling has been quite exclusive and very hard to achieve success in. Women, girls, boys and men, and all genders and races or people who did not fit the "mold" did not get a chance to express themselves how they felt free to do, because they were seen as "unworthy" to be on magazine covers, or not "Hollywood". Told to sit down and go get a day job because you are not a size 2 or the right hue...But, now we have the plus size movement, the non-binary movement, etc.. all because the internet has become a place where artists of all kinds can express how they feel. This has been WORLD changing for the confidence of humanity. For the healing of humankind.


I sometimes think if I had been born maybe just twenty years earlier, someone as tall and diverse as me, 6'6, would have not been able to be who she wanted as a model, just because "I am too tall" and I don't quite fit in to any of the typical roles and stereotypes of a successful entertainment persona. The internet being what it was in the past---obsolete-- would have meant that my life would be completely void of expressing on various mediums, unless otherwise "discovered" by someone "important".


In fact, still today, I and others like me are constantly facing rejections due to height and being a woman. I am just as much of these actors and models who get told no, no, no and not taken seriously because I am "too tall" for TV or for modeling. And that is why social media is such a fascinating place to explore oneself and expression. It is a great place to grow confidence, but in no means a place to sustain it. Confidence is something that is built and sustained within, and that is the message that should be pushed. I am very against telling anyone their way of life is wrong, unless of course, they are hell bent on being a serial killer..


So, obviously this meme triggered me in such a way that I was able to explore just how far internet and social media has come. I thoroughly enjoy seeing how people express themselves and yes, maybe we see a lot of people who seem like they are "trying to copy" celebrities, but maybe that is the path of their expression that leads them into discovering their own life purpose and path...


And isn't that the path we all have taken at some point in our lives?


Chill out humanity!


I want to just end this post by saying,


live and let live,


we can all respect eachother a little more by respecting ourselves.


What may resonate with you, may not resonate with your neighbor, and that is okay:)


Till next post,


Have a dope ass day/night!



Malia