My Mind: Poetry I Shouldn't Share

by Malia Nahinu

1.

I am human

Just

Human

It’s Monday

Another Monday

And I take the trash out to the edge

Of my pitiful drought infested California curb

Filled with empty dreams…

I mean empty beer bottles

Something my pa would say

Supposedly as a joke

It used to be nice here

Come back twenty years ago

When everyone’s grass filled the streets

With beautiful green trees

And enormous yellow bees

My brother and I would run free

Playing baseball, and basketball

Soccer and Dodgeball too!

It used to be nice here

There I am

Tuesday

Another Tuesday

After my morning shower

After the pissing and the flossing

The pulling and the plucking

The brushing and the drying

I stare

A naked stare

A bare-chested kind of stare

And I ponder over

What worries the time

And I wonder what hurries

My mind

Am I living for

Money?

Or just a hope

That this fucking poem will…

Rhyme

I think about my toes

About the tiny critters that are exposed

They scream and shriek for their lives

Are squished under my feets

Without getting so little as

An I’m sorry

So, Tuesday

This Tuesday

Same as the rest

I have no original thought

I have no original name or crop

I need sleep and food and sex and…

Sometimes,

Pot

Another Wednesday

Cereal is the choice of fuel

I like the sugary, tasty cardboards

Prescription drugs

Within our food

Addictive hugs

Lased in the autopilot greetings of my neighbors

Hello

Hi

How are you?

Okay bye.

2.

Segregation in a post integrated society

Separate yourself they say

“Be Different”

Ethnically muddled

“Ambiguous”

Like a hybrid from outer space

True Alien

Where do I fit in?

Who are my people?

Who looks like me?

Who can I follow?

What is my culture?

A war inside

To define my outside

White girl

Tall girl

Small girl

Long girl

One

Two

One

Two

Who are you?

3.

Starving the

Workaholics

Killing the

Alcoholics

Mind numbing the

Shopaholics

Hashtag

#Ican’tbreathe

Through all of my

Addictions

My Breath

Holds a scent of cold death

And

Nature

Escapes the bodily form I come from

And it’s just scenery

Nurture

Suture

Race

To the finish line they told me

Think about your looks

Be proud of your culture

Be proud of your ancestry